jensinkler[Spots🐆] “How old are you?” he asks. “I’m 38,” I say. “Daaaaaang, if you were a banana, you’d have spots by now!” he exclaims.///I don’t know him well; he’s just some guy from the gym who doesn’t know that I’m studying him for his word choice and behavior, gleaning everything I can about how to most effectively handle iffy social interactions. He's always happy to unwittingly comply, most often circling the whereabouts of my husband (but with the occasional foray into fruit, or the observation that I haven’t been to the gym much lately and that I am starting to look “regular”).///He seems to be consistently baffled whenever I’m at the gym without David, even though I’m at the gym most days without David. The question comes without fail: “Where’s your husband?" The vast majority of the time, I answer it directly: “He’s lifting later,” or “He’s off today,” thinking that with enough repetitions, this person might begin to understand that I am able to exist in space and time without a chaperone. (@ddn3d and I don’t even lift together even when we are there at the same time, which makes the question all the more curious.) Sometimes he helpfully adds how important it is to spend enough time with your partner. Patriarchy in motion, I suppose. (For the record, David says he is never asked these questions.)///While my tactic is normally to try to wear this guy out with the sheer factual boringness of my answers, last week I’d finally had it: “[Name redacted]!” I said. “You lift weights all the time without your wife. Why is it so impossible for you to grasp that I lift weights without my husband?!” I was clearly exasperated, and felt almost disappointed as I said it, thinking my words would surely bring this phase of my study to an unsatisfactory close. It didn’t. (I should have known better.)///As for the banana comment, I replied that I am very much enjoying the process of aging. What he doesn’t know yet is that the crinkles around my eyes are the whiskers of a lion, that my spots are those of a leopard, and that I’m lying in wait, waiting for the right time to eat him alive.///#30daysofstories #april10 #day10 #tellmeastory
- will_.i_.amSeriously! This is so amazing! You are incredibly inspiring @jensinkler #crushingit
- laurameeksYeeeeahhhhh, girl. 🐯
- shartman2006Oh hell yes! I love this woman!! @mrswhoopiepie read her response to the guy!
- beurbestAs a man who never asks these questions I love you answers!!
- garyheshikifitness@jensinkler idiots...giving my gender a bad name. 😒
- trefalynHave a couple of kids-then talk to me about aging😂😂
- melsstronggoalsYes! I wish I had the ability to come back with witty responses like that. I turn 40 in two weeks and am reminded by coworkers that I'm officially "old" at that age. I usually don't even answer that because it's such a silly comment.
- gradontrippDude doesn't even realize bananas -like wine and people – get better with age.
- gradontripp@melsstronggoals I turned 40 a couple months ago. If anyone says something about being old, I respond, "What are you talking about? I'm going to live to 120, so I'm only 1/3 of the way there."
- idahogirl7@stperez14 @nikkysmittyrn love this!
- theporkchopityI would have set that mothertrucker on fire. 🔥🔥🔥
- emteague"Better to remain silent and be thought a fool than to speak and to remove all doubt." Not that you thought he was a fool before, but now?
- beastskillsIf this guy was an ice cream flavor, he'd be pralines and dick.
- gorgeousestherOh my darling when is your book coming out? It's ripe and juicy for the picking. 🔥🔥🔥
- jllundriganYou are an engaging storyteller @jensinkler. I can't wait for the next story where you pop this asshat in the throat.
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