skyler.mechelleThis work cannot be as pivotal as it will be if I don't have support. Just plain fact. I change the world by living in it, for myself. I answer precious emails from souls questioning the pain they feel in their vaginas. I work with children and hear them when they speak out truths they share. I dance in fields and invite my joy to exist in my pain, not to lessen or validate it or make it easier to digest.
I would be impactful if I do end up in a small town scooping ice cream, because I am me. A lot of the fear of not being enough if I did do that forever came from this wonky view that trauma eventually ends and if it hasn't healing still needs to happen. Now, whilst there is validity in the fact that no matter what trauma you've experienced (the loss of an animal to incest) your emotional experience of it will never leave you and will come to meet you when you're ready, even if you've experienced and felt it 1000 times before. But there is no fucking way that you're less than and not enough because of it.
Right now, in this moment, the system of law has failed us. If we are going to make shifts and resolve the insane normalisation of abuse, we HAVE TO TALK ABOUT IT. We have to share about it. We have to be okay being fucking uncomfortable, and sit with the one in pain in their darkest deepest corner and hear them.
Hear them, not fix them. Hear them.
What every single human wants is to be heard and not dismissed. Fixing it, offering advise, calling 911 when they're talking about how painful it is and they want to die, offering anything but a listening ear unknowingly (innocently) teaches them it's just their problem. If I speak too in depth, I will have to be fixed. So I will just carry it alone, and not be a burden.
That is so heavy, on top of how heavy it is to feel it. What we need is to be heard. Everyone. Because we all have the capability to connect to ourselves and know what WE need, we just need to be given the opportunity to use it.
Despite my deep understanding of trauma, I will never be able to know what yours felt like for you. But I do trust you with it. I trust you when you cry to be in a coffee shop, (continued in comments)
- skyler.mechelleI trust you when you send sobbing emojis over instagram, I trust you as you feel. I believe you. And believe me, it is not always comfortable. It is down right uncomfortable at times.
To sit in a space with someone and watch as all these conditioned responses rise up within me and tell me I'm neglecting this person by simply hearing them and not "helping," that by standing in the space of pain with them and listening I am failing them. Woah nelly.
But that is exactly what I need to do. Because I can never ever tell them what they should do. I do not know. You do not know. They know. They have (we all have) just been so conditioned out of that space, because we have be conditioned to believe we shouldn't know. That we are too much or too little or too sick or too happy or too depressed or too damaged to know.
But even the person who sits beside you in their darkest pain, saying they would rather end it all than continue, knows what they need.
This work is not just about trauma, but trauma has allowed me to navigate it in a really radical way.
Your monthly support has the potential to bring me to countries across the world, school houses, theatres, communities, organisations and/or little small town ice cream shops to talk to and speak about navigating trauma, and how to support those you love who are navigating it.
For $1 a month ($12 a year) you'll not only support me, as I go from VA to volunteer, with food and flights and shelter, but them. This. Us. Ending the silence on trauma, is ending the silence for everything.
#baths #dancing #silly #travel #worldtravel #explore #destination #traveler #empowergirls #mentalhealth #sexualassault #abuse #activist #author #rapeculture #endit #nomeansno #violenceagainstwomen #bopo #addiction #patrons #patreon #endrapeculture #artist #digitalart
- janellemmmI love you so much, my lovely lily.
- skyler.mechelle@janellemmm i love you so much Janellybean!
- swingerella13Discomfort. Oh the discomfort. And to see it on the faces of the audience during and after the show. To feel like a dirty open wound. A secret. To expose this whilst still suffering trauma. To be shamed for it. Most silenced in an Indian jail. To be shamed in the tabloids. To lose loyal friends who say you just stop. You must be post trauma. A d to experience all this whilst being in trauma. MIND FUCK. To still be sharing this story? No. To still be a story? Yes and no. To be a mirror
- skyler.mechelle@swingerella13 thank you for your rawness that continually makes me question, shift, and open myself to hear things that make me uncomfortable. But more importantly thank you for allowing me to stand with you.
Log in to like or comment.