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  • richardinebarteeOn Thursday, it will be two months since we lost Alex in the #OaklandFire. Until I sat and thought about it, what seemed like out of nowhere, I started to weep again. I think it is because yesterday we (@errrrickk and I) found the courage to start filming @GrungeCake content again. All of you may not know it but Alex produced, directed and edited all of my video content 3-4 years ago with @mrnuday. Everything from my interview with Kid Ink during his #MyOwnLaneTour to the #FIFA coverage with Aloe Blacc. Yesterday during test filming for a new #GrungeCake video series, I thought about him. I wanted him to be there so bad but he wasn't and he won't be able to be there in the future. The reality of it broke my heart into even smaller pieces. I know I will never be the same but I am learning to cope with the reality of the biggest tragedy in my life. It is one thing to watch what happens on television and read stories in the newspapers about others and it is another thing to know who the journalists and the reporters have written about or speaking of. As a growing human, there is something that happens--that numbs you to tragedy, that makes you step over homeless people on the sidewalk, share photos of a dead child on a seashore, and make you feel like it isn't your problem. I don't want to be part of that society. I don't want to be numb and emotionless anymore, and I can't be. Alex's death thawed me. I feel everything. I care more--about more people. Alex, I am sure I can speak for anyone who has ever met you or worked with you: We still love you and we miss you. Even though you are gone, you have left behind a great support system, and I will forever appreciate all that you have done for me. Thank you for changing my life! Thank you for being my big brother, and thank you for giving me a new direction and a new focus. May all of us find pockets of peace in life until we reunite with our loved ones. We are going to need it. #AlexGhassan #OaklandFire #BrokenHeart #DealingWithDeath #Life #Reflections #Artists #Community #SupportYourFriends #ItIsOKToFeel #FeelSomething #LiveLifeToTheFullest #ForAlex

  • isamthecreativeI miss him so much
  • richardinebarteeI feel sick this morning, Isam. I feel like a child with a weak immune system: @mrnuday.
  • richardinebarteeMe too. I can say that I am not sad but I feel the huge void. It is nearly crippling because he is irreplaceable, @mrnuday.
  • jackbrewerbsi🙏🏿
  • homeboysandmanafter having discussed videos ideas over email back and forth, i met alex for the only time during a stones throw anniversary show in san francisco in early november. since his passing, it's been really moving to see how many people i hold in high regard loved him. I'm very grateful i got the opportunity to embrace him and experience his energy. my love and condolences homey.
  • richardinebarteeOh no, I think the two of you would have made something so beautiful! Thank you for sharing that, @homeboysandman. He loved music so much, and he would tell me about so many different artists to check out—from all over the world. He had great taste!
  • richardinebarteeThank you, jackbrewerbsi! I appreciate it.
  • errrrickkNever going to be the same.
  • richardinebarteeEver! @errrrickk
  • pzerotheartistSo sorry for your lost sis. Very sorry. Be strong. Loves
  • richardinebarteeThank you, @pzerotheartist. I miss him dearly. He would make me laugh so hard whenever he teased @errrrickk 🤣🤣🤣
  • massworldwide🙏🏿 Wonderful Words 🙏🏿
  • regalsavageLove it!
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